Several years ago, I was a member of a pretty popular, local photography group that shared photos, ideas, information and basic camaraderie with like-minded individuals. There were several pros and many amateurs on the site which, in the beginning, worked out well for those trying to learn the craft as those with experience were more than willing to share the knowledge they had accumulated.
On one occasion, an amateur member of the site shared a photo that they were particularly proud of. They weren't asking for a critique, or comment, they simply were proud of a photo they had taken. Several folks chimed in that they liked this, or that about the photo and all was well. However, it didn't take too long before someone who was considered a "pro" left a negative comment, basically critiquing the photo and telling the poster of the photo that they should just leave things like that to the "pros". Several others of us chimed in, trying to support the original poster of the photo, while at the same time, trying to explain to the offending "pro" that perhaps, his words were a little too harsh and unsolicited. The back and forth went on for some time, until as I can best recall, the moderator of the website locked the content, or deleted it altogether.
Jumping forward 20 years or so...
I chose to use the example above because I had personally experienced it, and found it to be, over the course of several years, a symptom of a bigger problem. With the advent and popular use of the internet, and social media type web platforms, communication between people started a downward spiral of negativity and as of 2021, has become a serious issue in the lack of civility between people.
The internet is an amazing, learning tool, but also has its downsides. I've read many posts about what possibly causes people to be so rude, and to act (for some) out of character. In a nutshell, many people have become "keyboard warriors" and feel free to say whatever they think, partially because they are hidden behind the security of a monitor, tablet or phone and do not have to face people directly, and have no accountability for the things they say. I personally know a few people who, when you talk with them in person, are genuinely friendly, easy to get along with, and fun to discuss things with, however, those same people post some of the most hate-laden vitriol and speech on the internet. I can completely understand about being passionate about a particular topic, as there are many that I am passionate about, but what I don't understand is the need to ridicule, talk down to, insult or flat out be derogatory towards others... especially those they have never met in person.
The tendency for people to communicate more from the comfort of a computer or smart device has grown immensely over the last few decades; not to mention the fact that in 2020-2021 the entire world is having to deal with being quarantined at home due to the spread of the Covid-19 virus and in the U.S. a highly heated, partisan election of a president certainly fueled some fires.
In these cases, manners, decency and civility are often overlooked. I don't see this form of communication changing anytime soon (in fact, I see it continuing to grow), so I would offer that, when commenting or posting on the internet, try to remember to be respectful, and courteous to everyone, not those that you just agree with. Anytime you want to post or comment, ask yourself, 'is this going to upset someone'. Now granted, in this day and age, people seem to be a little more easily offended than perhaps in years passed, but that doesn't change the fact that positivity towards yourself and others can create a better environment for us all. Also, if you're thinking to yourself that you don't care if you offend others or not, then I would ask you, why do you feel like that, and do you think it helps or hurts you.
If you're unsure in this day and age of how to actually be civil, talk with others, especially grand parents or the elderly. They would certainly appreciate your time, probably have years of experience, and would most likely enjoy spending time with you. Also, there are literally thousands of books out there on the subject, and we can all use a little more education in our daily lives, I know I certainly can. The benefits of learning to be civil are simply too numerous to mention, but it gives you the opportunity to discuss things without getting heated, and to possibly meet new friends with common interests.
I would also challenge you to get out in public, and actually meet with your friends and family (following any Covid-19 related rules) just to talk, share ideas and enjoy each other's company face-to-face. Clubs, fraternities, sororities, social groups and other similar venues are great ways to meet others in person, with like-minded ideas to learn, grown and create new and lasting friendships.
Above all else, be kind to one another, and yourself.
